Losing the drive

That declamation piece I posted a few days back...it's been in my draft file since last month. I posted it because I've really nothing to write about. I'm losing my drive to write, and here's why.
Ever notice that there comes a time when you don't feel like writing anything? Or that moment when you dread opening your blog to find lesser and fewer comments?

Ever notice how infrequent thoughts come, or maybe there are some seed thoughts but you can't put them in writing?

Ever notice how you put aside some ideas only to find out later that other people managed to write about it?

These past few days, I keep noticing exactly that!

My posts are few and far between unlike a year ago because I really don't feel like writing anything now. There's just no idea coming out of my head. I guess I need to go back to the basic -- of what my blog is really all about: myself and my life in Saudi.

Here then are the snippets of what I wish I could write about, but just can't because words would just not flow. Huwag pilitin kung ayaw!

Story 1
: The other day, while we were on our way home, I saw a group of Saudi kids playing American football. I suddenly remembered my elementary days when, after we've watered our garden (I wonder if school kids still have gardening activities in school), we would gather together to play Filipino version of a football (where someone rolls a plastic ball and you kick it). I wish to write extensively about that -- the lessons the game taught us, our tricks in winning the game, the pains of being unselected by your favorite team captain, etc.

Story 2: Because I've a working parents, most of time they leave my sister and I alone at home. My father who works on second shift (from 2pm to 10pm) would cajole us to take a long nap in the afternoon before he goes to work, and by the time we wake up, our mother (who works first shift from 6am to 2pm) would already be home from work. It was really a very rewarding experience because we learned to fend for ourselves while we wait for one of our parents to arrive home. A great deal of lessons there: independence, practicality, the greatness of the old times when you can leave your kids with a neighbor and need not worry about their safety.

Story 3: Most of us spend more time at work than anywhere else. Unknowingly our work slowly defines us. Or should it? I have a rewarding job. Rewarding in a sense that I get a regular salary decent enough to provide assistance to my family in the Philippines and just enough to leave me a few savings. But I still yearn for that job which would reward me inwardly? Confession: I wish to own my own business. I know it's not impossible, but the thought of not receiving a steady monthly salary scares me. To own a business is a courageous act. Too bad I'm a spineless business dreamer. Perhaps when necessity comes, I'd be forced to reinvent myself and finally realize my long time dream.

Those are the ideas that are playing in my head which I can't find time to expound and write about.

I'm revving up. I hope sooner than later, I'd be on the road again to posting decent and sound thoughts.

11 Responses

  1. Ze Cabreira says:

    Nebz, don't worry if you can't put some of your thoughts into writings, it happen sometimes. I'm sure you'll be back in your ownself in a jiffy, because you are an amazing writer.

    How about those interviews you'll going to make with those people there in Al Khobar? Remember that? You've given us a preview of what you'll write last year.

  2. Francesca says:

    I do the same. Ang dami ko gusto isulat, wala ako maisip!
    una kasi naisip ko, if isulat ko ang isang kwento, baka boring.
    If isulat ko ang isa, baka isipin, nagyayabang na naman si Tsimay...
    If isulat ko ang isang kwento, parang hindi angkop, baka ma libel ako.

    Haayz, wala kita sa blogging, kaya if hindi ako happy to publish it, I dont muna.

    I will get that "RIGHT TIMING SOON"!!!!!!!
    kesehoda may comment or wala, basta sige lang, publish!
    its not their blog, its ours, we do what we like, hahahhaa

  3. Ken says:

    ako naman, if I feel like not writing or blanko, i come visit some of my favorite blogs and will be inspired to write about something...ganun lang yun, get strength and inspiration from others.

    another thing, ang blog ko, feel ko, online diary ko, so it doesn't matter kung may magcomment or wala, masaya ako na nagpupublish, although syempre added excitement pag maraming nagcocomment.

    help me write with Janelle, Blogusvox, and Jess and other Saudi and Middle East Bloggers a book, like Guide 101 for Saudi OFW's. Hehehe

    Pamimigay natin sa PEDOS. haha

  4. The Pope says:

    We are on the same boat Nebz, I feel so drained, ito kaya'y epekto ng El Nino phenomenon?

    I am contemplating on a l-o-n-g hiatus, I'll make the announcement soon.

    God bless you.

  5. BlogusVox says:

    Alam mo ang problema mo? You aim to please your readers!

    Try pleasing yourself first. Kesehuda kung gusto nila o hindi ang sinusulat mo. O di kaya mag comment o hinde, basta masaya ka sa ginagawa mo.

    That's the reason why we blog in the first place. It serves as a hobby and an outlet of our creative thoughts.

  6. RJ says:

    Naisip ko, dapat nga po gaganahan kayong magsulat kasi top awardee sa PEBA at na-recognize pa sa Pinoy Blog Awards ang Isla de Nebz.

    o",)

  7. Trainer Y says:

    ganun naman daw po talaga sa mga writers diba? hindi laging malaya ang agos ng mga ideya sa isipan... hindi laging maraming mga bagay na mapapag-isipan para isulat.. kung minsan pakiramdam mo mparang naubos ung mga salita na maari mong gamitin para mapagkone-konekta at makagawa ng isang matinong likha...normal daw po yan...baka kailangan pa ng kaunting pahinga.. :D

  8. witsandnuts says:

    Don't worry much, it's a phase. Dumating din sakin yung ganyang "moment". Pag wala ako sa mood, hindi ko pinipilit. But when ideas strike, I draft them immmediately. Kaya yung time na medyo tamad ako magsulat, saka ko pina-publish yung nasa drafts. I agree with Blogusvox's comment. Just enjoy blogging. =)

  9. amegamo2 says:

    basta always remember nebz that you are an inspiration to your reader especially me...thanks and keep on writing when you have time...cheer up!

  10. Esoy1216 says:

    O heto pandagdag sa comment hehe! normal lang yan Nebz sa isang blogger (of ur stature) na marami nag-aabang sa posts mo. when u write so often sometimes u feel like u run out of ideas.

    kung ako nga kabago-bago lagi tinatamad magsulat esp. kung may maganda palabas sa tv at live tennis, yun lang kase pampatanggal pagod ko from a day's hard work.

  11. Sardonyx says:

    Nebz, wala ka pang malagay sa lagay na yan ha?? hehehe ang haba na kaya nang na post mo, compared sa kin as in drain na drain ako once a week na lang magpost konti pa comments hehehe, siguro ganun yata talaga, walang inspirasyon LOL....sa manufacturing ba nagwork ang mga mom and dad mo?? o sa hospital?? wala lang curious lang ako hehehe

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